A Life Less Rushed: What Are We Really Running From?
The State of Rushing. We all know the feeling. The bus is about to leave, the deadline is closing in, the meeting is in five minutes, and we haven’t even had a chance to take a full breath. Life sometimes demands that we pick up the pace, but there’s a difference between simply moving quickly and being caught in a state of rushing.
Rushing isn’t just about speed. It carries with it a certain frustration, tension, even anxiety. It’s not simply about getting somewhere—it’s about escaping something.
This realisation came to me when I noticed my own tendency to rush. I saw how often I was pushing forward, not because I needed to, but because something within me was uncomfortable with stillness. Perhaps you can relate.
What if rushing isn’t really towards something, but rather away from something? And what if we could break free from that pattern?
The Psychology of Rushing: What Are We Avoiding?
When we find ourselves repeatedly caught in the habit of rushing, it’s worth asking:
What emotions arise when I stop?
What happens in my body when I slow down?
What am I afraid of confronting?
Rushing often masks underlying emotional discomfort. It is not just about getting things done; it is often about avoiding the stillness that might bring certain feelings to the surface.
The Role of Anxiety and Fear
From a psychological perspective, rushing can be seen as a coping mechanism. In states of anxiety or unresolved stress, the nervous system goes into fight-or-flight mode, triggering a sense of urgency—even when none is required.
Some people rush because slowing down feels like failure.
Others rush because they feel uneasy being present with themselves.
Many rush because they have internalised the belief that their worth is tied to productivity.
Whatever the reason, the impulse to rush often points to something deeper—a discomfort that is easier to ignore when we stay in motion.
The Nervous System and the Rushing Cycle
From a psychotherapeutic perspective, the habit of rushing is linked to the autonomic nervous system (ANS). The ANS governs our stress responses, regulating whether we feel safe or on high alert.
How Rushing Affects the Nervous System
Rushing activates the sympathetic nervous system, keeping the body in a heightened state of tension.
When we rush habitually, the body learns to stay in stress mode, reinforcing patterns of anxiety.
Over time, this can contribute to chronic stress, burnout, and even physical pain.
Therapeutic approaches such as somatic therapy, breathwork, and mindfulness help shift the nervous system out of rushing mode and into a state of regulation.
Breaking the Rushing Habit: The Role of Therapy
So how do we step out of the cycle of rushing? The answer isn’t necessarily slowing down—it’s about becoming present.
A skilled therapist can help clients explore:
What is being avoided through rushing?
What happens internally when they allow themselves to pause?
What deeper emotions are waiting to be acknowledged?
Therapeutic Approaches That Help Shift Rushing Patterns
Mindfulness and Somatic Awareness
Noticing bodily sensations associated with rushing (tight chest, clenched jaw, shallow breath).
Developing the ability to sit with discomfort rather than flee from it.
Internal Resourcing
Learning to create a sense of internal safety so that stillness no longer feels threatening.
Using techniques such as grounding exercises and breathwork to regulate the nervous system.
Transactional Analysis (TA) and the Inner Critic
TA can help uncover the unconscious ‘scripts’ that drive our rushing.
Many people operate under an internalised message such as: "I must always be achieving to be worthy." Therapy helps challenge these beliefs and create healthier patterns.
Exploring Early Attachment Patterns
Those with insecure attachment styles often develop rushing as a way to manage underlying anxiety.
Therapy can help individuals develop a sense of inner security, reducing the need for constant movement.
A New Relationship with Time and Stillness
When we start to question the impulse to rush, we begin to redefine our relationship with time and presence. Instead of viewing stillness as wasted time, we can see it as an opportunity to meet ourselves more fully.
Practical Steps to Cultivate a Life Less Rushed
Pause for a moment before reacting to urgency. Ask yourself: Is this truly urgent, or am I reacting from habit?
Check in with your body. Where do you feel the sensation of rushing? Can you breathe into it?
Practice ‘micro-moments’ of stillness. Even 10 seconds of deep breathing can help shift your nervous system.
Engage in therapy. A professional can help uncover the deeper patterns driving the need to rush.
Redefine success. What if success was measured not by speed, but by presence and depth?
Towards a More Present Life
Slowing down is not about doing less—it’s about experiencing more. It’s about meeting ourselves in the moment, rather than rushing past our own lives.
If we can learn to pause, to feel, and to embrace the discomfort we once ran from, we might find something unexpected:
The thing we were rushing towards was never as important as the presence we were rushing away from.
The natural rhythm of action will emerge when we stop forcing it.
Stillness holds wisdom—if we are willing to listen.
A life less rushed could be an enjoyable experience after all.
Would you like support in exploring this tendency further? Therapy offers a space to slow down, process what’s underneath, and cultivate a greater sense of ease in your life.
Written by Thomas Hatton
As a psychotherapist, Thomas seeks to empower individuals to overcome their personal challenges and achieve lasting growth. His ideal client is someone who is ready to do the deep inner work required for meaningful change.